Totally InapROPEriate

Sorry to refer to the Daily Fail, but HAVE YOU SEEN THIS ARTICLE? – If you don’t want to contribute to Fail clicks, that’s fine, because I’m about to rip it to shreds so small, even a hamster wouldn’t bed itself in them.

“A Russian health expert has said young girls should not climb ropes or ride bikes in case they have accidental orgasms, claiming it can lead to future problems such as divorce.”

Translates roughly to: A Russian man. claiming to be a health expert, has never known the love of a woman and blames inanimate objects that are oft-placed near lady parts during normal sporting activities for his own inability to understand or communicate with them.

Apparently, when we’re shimmying up and down those ropes, we’re playing a dangerous game that could result in ‘Family quarrels, reproaches, disharmony [and] divorces.”

As much as I find this viewpoint disgusting, sexist, harmful, misogynistic, unhelpful, weird and just a bit too bloody contrived, I have to hand it to this Russian creep… He may have a point. 

I have half a mind to pepper his inbox with these absolute beauties:

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Not content with a simple rope, Hannah decides to broaden her horizons, literally.

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Good husbands know how to satisfy their wives without the need for ropes.

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Adam just can’t help getting in on the action. Girls get all the fun.

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Rope climbs are all well and good, but Christie is all about size.

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Christie, thinking about what’s to come. We’ve all been there.

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This is totally inappropriate. They’re sisters for god’s sake.

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Heather can do it ONE HANDED.

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Christie was later banned from building one for fraternising with inanimate objects

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This is why we will never get married, Annie. We shall be on the rack of love.

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What WILL the neighbours think?

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What’s the difference between a rope climb and an orgasm? You can’t fake a rope climb.

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My first foursome, caught on camera. (The rope counts as a person, right?)

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Rosanna won’t be giving the thumbs up when all of her traversing leads to family quarrels.

To Russia, with love 😉

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